Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Maxwell Megalomania: Bunnies and Eggs Have Nothing to Do with Easter

Great combination of events this morning, folks! 

We got hit by an ice storm and I'm getting over a bout of the stomach flu. 

Honestly, it worked out well for me.  The school I was scheduled to work at was closed so I spent the morning sleeping and feel quite a bit better already.   My son is safely packed out with his grandparents for the night so hopefully I'll be good to go by tomorrow.


I greatly appreciate a dose of humor to keep my spirits from sagging when I'm sick so I decided to review an old blog post by the Maxwells that made me laugh so hard.  In 2012, several people asked the Maxwells why they don't have anything involving bunnies or baskets of sweets when they celebrate Easter, - sorry - "Resurrection Sunday**".

Maxwell decides the best option is to write an entire blog post:Bunnies and Baskets that he swears in the comments sections he wrote to be non-judgemental.  To my eyes, the judgemental portion outweighs his occasional sop towards tolerance like the first paragraph response after re-posting the offending comments:

Christianity is not a democracy, and if millions of “devout” Christians exercise their faith in a particular way, it doesn’t necessarily make it pleasing to the Lord. Living one’s life according to the Bible should be every professing Christian’s (sic) desire and practice. I do understand that many churches have bunnies and baskets to perhaps reach the lost. Each person/church’s conduct/choices are between them and the Lord.

Hmmm. 

See, that sentence about how millions of Christians are doing Christianity wrong....that's judgemental. 

Additionally, that sentence is incredibly arrogant.  And dumb.   Has anyone - even the commenter who talked about how millions of Christians who involve candy bunnies in baskets  for Easter - implied that Christianity is a democracy? 

I'm one of those devout Christians who includes bunnies, eggs and flowers in Easter celebrations - so allow me to reverse Maxwell's assumption.   Oddly enough, Steven Maxwell views himself as theologically educated enough to run his own church - but he declares in the middle of the next paragraph that there is no "natural tie-in or segue" between the Resurrection and bunnies, eggs, or candy baskets.   Why have millions - or billions - of Christians through history connected Jesus's miraculous rising from the dead to bunnies, eggs, and flowers?  What have they seen that Maxwell misses?

Rabbits, eggs and flowers are all symbols of new life.  Jesus' resurrection opened to the world a new life where everyone could be saved by God.   The birth of a new animal or child is wonderful today when we understand reproduction - but the ability of life to continue onward was literally magical and connected to the divine through most of history. Eggs are especially miraculous - how does an animal that requires mating get the sperm or the baby into a hard shell?

Now that's I've vented my spleen about the first sentence, let me move on to the second sentence. 

I love Protestants of all stripes - but seriously - the majority of Christians on the planet fit into the denominations of Roman Catholicism, Eastern Orthodoxy and the Coptic Church.  Those three denominations have lots of disagreements - but none of them prioritize Scriptural revelation over revelation that happens through church traditions.   Yelling "Sola Scriptura!" is not a winning argument in the three older Christian traditions; all it does is cause the members of those religions to exchange exasperated looks around the person yelling it.

Let me express this another way. 

It's as irritating as me yelling "You have no church cultural tradition of skipping bunnies, baskets and eggs!" every time Steven Maxwell strips away a cultural tradition.   Since my religion's frame of reference is different from Maxwell's, holding him to the my religion's frame is ignorant at best and presumptuous at worst.

Sentence three is a hot mess of qualifiers; the stripped down sentence of "I understand that churches have bunnies and baskets to reach the lost" is elegant compared to the original.   The qualifiers serve the critical purpose of watering down the sensible statement into a mishmash of babble.   Without the qualifiers, Maxwell would be open to the question of "Your family attracts people for tracting by offering face-painting - including the logos of sports teams - despite the fact that you teach that participating or watching sports at any level leads inexorably to immoral habits.  How is your behavior more moral than offering kids candy shaped like bunnies at Easter when no one (including you) argues that candy bunnies leads to evil?"

The fourth sentence was clearly added later to be less judgemental along with the weak/weakened third sentence.    How can I tell?  Mainly because the rest of the essay reads much more smoothly without it.   Hell, there's even a nice transition between discussing the second sentences ideas of ideals of Christian living and the next paragraph's hook about looking at two objects at once.   That original writing worked - and I rarely compliment.

The rest of the essay alternates between sketchy Biblical interpretation based on Maxwell's weak understanding of the word "idle" and how the meaning of words change over time and cranky air-quotes about "Christians" and "holidays".   There's even the required denouncement of Halloween as evil.  I'll skip my required denouncement against denouncing Halloween and against the dangers of reading the KJV without an advanced degree in Medieval Studies.

Finally, I'll leave you with my favorite idolatrous quote of the essay:

Having an egg hunt for the family on Resurrection Sunday is similar to celebrating Mother’s Day by the family watching basketball, when Mom hates basketball. Resurrection Sunday is a day that is to be all about Jesus!

I'm pretty sure "Jesus hates family egg hunts" insults Sola Scriptura more than the family egg hunts do. 

As Luke 10:21 lovingly shares " At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do."

Kids understand what to do when we receive good news.  We rejoice with our whole bodies, minds and souls!  And what better day to rejoice than the day Jesus conquered death for us! 

Amen.  Alleluia!  Alleluia!

Thanks for listening :-)

**"Resurrection Day" messes with my head since I keep confusing it with "Reformation Day" - the Lutheran celebration of Luther nailing the theses to Wittenberg Cathedral door on November 1st when Catholics were expected to attend Mass since it was a Holy Day of Obligation.  Pretty brilliant, Luther!

11 comments:

  1. "How is your behavior more moral than offering kids candy shaped like bunnies at Easter when no one (including you) argues that candy bunnies leads to evil?"

    No one argues that candy bunnies lead to evil? I started giggling at that part, because one of the original Veggie Tales movies was a retelling of the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, but with a giant chocolate bunny as the idol. Rack, Shack and Benny had to sing The Bunny Song (in praise of the chocolate bunny) or they would get thrown in the furnace. So Big Idea argued that chocolate bunnies lead to evil. Haha!

    Sorry not sorry for this bunny trail.

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    1. I love it! I've never seen that Veggie Tale - those came out after my younger brother was outside of the target age group - but I can't wait until my son is old enough to start watching them.

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    2. The original ones are great! I haven't seen the Netflix version because those veggies just look CREEPY.

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  2. And then there's the demon Anya's pathological fear of bunnies in 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'...

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    1. Oooh! I never watched that show - but I like the theme. That reminded me of the Killer Bunny of Caerbannog from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail".

      This clip is my go-to for giggle therapy when I'm having a rough day. No matter how many times I see it the sight gag of a bunny savaging knights causes me to guffaw.

      https://youtu.be/XcxKIJTb3Hg

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  3. My feelings are: is this all they've got to talk about? Bunnies? Easter eggs? There are actual problems facing the world. If they think this is one of them then they have not a clue.

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    1. The best way I've heard the Maxwells' blog described is a blog of people who are trapped in the movie "Groundhog Day" - without ever having watched the movie.

      They've isolated themselves so thoroughly from everything and everyone else that they just muddle through the same yearly events over and over and over....

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    2. They remind me of Pleasantville characters. Big surprise they're even denied the colors of Easter.

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  4. Even recovering from a sickness, you manage a post that teaches and entertains. Thank you! :) Hope you're feeling good now!

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