Joyfully At Home: Chapter Seven - Part One

I mentioned in a previous post that I am in the middle of the Labor Day paint sale at the home improvement retailer that I work for.   The Sunday of Labor Day weekend, we had the internet connection fail to the paint dispensers.

I should step back and explain how we do work in the paint pit.  Our paint pit (also known as the paint desk) has two sides that are a short and a long stainless steel counter that make up two sides of a rectangle.  The short stainless counter is where we take orders from customers.  The long counter has six mixers underneath it for paint and stain containers that are one gallon or smaller.  We use the top of the long counter for securing paint can lids, placing dabs of paint on the lid and staging orders that are finished. At the leftmost corner where the two stainless counters come together, we have a standard computer where we can input orders and print off labels. The third side of the rectangle is made of three industrial paint shakers for 2-5 gallon containers and one of the paint dispenser.  This paint dispenser is called "Bert".  The last side is two half walls divided by a large entryway that opens into the aisle where the interior, exterior and masonry paints are at.  The right half wall is also where the second paint dispenser is located.  That paint dispenser is named "Ernie".

Due to a ceiling support column that sits about 18 inches off the front of Ernie, Bert is used much more frequently since filling paint orders on Ernie requires either walking around the column or shoving your shoulder and hip into the column.  Dispensing paint into 5 gallon containers is doable with Ernie - but there is not much room to maneuver due to the column, plus the 56 pound containers need to be wrestled across the pit to the industrial shakers afterwards.  Bert, on the other hand, is immediately next to the industrial shakers.

On a normal day, the work flow moves smoothly around the pit.  We discuss orders with customers at the short stainless counter.  Two workers can input the orders at a time into the CPU on the long counter or into Ernie who is next to the opposite end of the short counter. 

Currently, we have two paint order systems.  The older mostly DOS based system is completely baffling to new people.  None of the labels of the menus make any sense.  Oh, and the training videos were made before a large change in how the system works and never updated.   So the old system is crazy - but once you learn it after 2-3 weeks, it is very fast because the DOS package comes with keyboard macros for everything. 

Last month, we added a new internet paint order system.  The new system's labels make some sense on first read - but the functionality of the internet based system is much less than the old DOS system.  See, the old system has a lot of backdoor hacks that let us put all sorts of paint colors into exterior solid stains...or masonry paints...or primers.  The new internet system got rid of all those hacks.  Even on straightforward orders, the internet system takes longer for most people because it has no macros.

Once the order is inputted, we print out labels for each paint or stain can.  We tear off the labels and retrieve the correct bases (e.g., the cans of paint without pigments) from the aisles using the information on the label.  We put the sticker labels on the cans and go to either Ernie or Bert.  Since the computer and paint dispensers are all connected through the internet,  an order inputted at any terminal can be dispensed at either Ernie or Bert.  Once pigment is added, the top of the paint is secured and the can is shaken.  The last step is to re-open the can and visually inspect the paint.  Rarely, a paint appears streaky and needs an extra round of shaking.  If the paint looks good, a dab of paint is placed on the lid for customer inspection.  The can is resealed and placed on the customer's side of the long stainless steel counter.

Long story short: Bert disconnected from the internet around 9am.  Our boss got online with the IT department.  Through trial and error, we discovered that the computer and Ernie were still connected to the internet and each other so they had full functionality.  At the same time, Bert worked as a stand-alone machine where all orders to be dispensed were inputted on Bert.  Essentially, the two older nerdy co-workers (me and a gentleman nearing retirement) did our work off Bert while reminiscing about how great DOS systems were.  The younger folks who are college-aged OR preferred GUI systems kept the CPU and Ernie busy.  It was a little clumsy, but we were able to work at near full speed.

At 11am, IT tried to put a fix through.   The fix caused Bert to shutdown totally while disconnecting the CPU and Ernie from the internet. 

So...not the best fix.  More like a flaw, really.

This meant everyone now had to manually enter all orders in Ernie and all orders had to be dispensed on Ernie in the older DOS system.  Essentially, a system that we had honed to get rid of any bottlenecks - or rather, ended up bottlenecked at the paint mixers if we were really busy - now had a double bottleneck at inputting orders and dispensing orders. 

During the busiest times, I took to announcing in my teacher-voice that we were down to one slow-moving paint machine and that orders were taking 20-30 minutes to complete due to the bottleneck.  We would be thrilled if people stuck around - but we would not hold it personally if they left.

Eventually, we got Bert back to a stand-alone system which dropped order times to around 10 minutes for 1-3 cans and 15 for more than 3 cans. 

I have no idea what I'll see when I'm back at work on Wednesday - but the main topic of conversation was how we should commemorate the weekend.  Should we order commemorative pins?  Challenge coins?  My idea was patches embossed with "Labor Day Sale 2019 - DOS RULES!"

Anyway, we all survived - and we even sold some paint.

Ironically, my harried 8.5 hours shift yesterday ties into Chapter Seven of Jasmine Baucham's "Joyfully At Home" which allegedly deals with overcoming false ideas of marriage.  Well, that's what Ms. Baucham tried to do - but mainly by sharing how massively overworked she is as a single SAHD and declaring that being married is going to be that much work or more.

Some of these stories are mind blowing - like this anecdote where Jasmine tries to explain that being married is harder work than being a SAHD:

It's true: I am single, and I am a single who is very desirous of that infinitely more difficult state. Sometimes, though, it helps me to get a foretaste of married life. That always brings me back to reality and out of dreamland.

Well, you know when you have a pile of dishes in the sink, a load of laundry bleeping in the laundry room, a screaming baby in his playpen, two toddlers arguing over a toy in the living room, a list of chores as long as your arm, and errands to run before your mom and dad get back from their romantic weekend getaway... And you look to the heavens and sigh over the day when Prince Charming will come and rescue from the depths of despair? (pg. 85)

Let's be sure we've got the scene set.

 Jasmine (and possibly Trey) have been left at home with at least three (and possibly 5) kids under school age so their parents can have a weekend away.  In addition to keeping three or more small children alive, Jasmine is expected to do laundry, the normal household chores AND errands - while her parents are away for a romantic weekend.

That is completely absurd!

I'm an adult married woman with one toddler.  If I was leaving him with a teenager for a weekend,  I would leave a tidy house with all the chores done - and fully expect that I'd have to re-do all the chores to get the house clean again on Monday. 

Why?  Because teenagers are not adults.  I don't want my teenage daughter to be practicing multi-tasking child care with household chores without any adults around to put out fires if they happen.  Meals would have been planned ahead of time and require nothing more complicated than putting a frozen pizza in an oven or using the toaster to reheat frozen waffles.   Disposable plates were created for a reason.  Most other chores can be put on hold until the work week.   Toddlers can be hard on clothing - so maybe she'd need to do a load of laundry or two if there are a lot of accidents - but the rest can wait.  I certainly wouldn't want her running errands with three small children in the car with her.  Driving is a complex task that is hard enough alone.  Adding in three random loud noise makers in the back seat is cruel and dangerous.

Jasmine was very young when she wrote this - but common sense dictates that the average married couple doesn't go from wedding to a house filled with tiny children instantly.   Even if a newlywed couple gets knocked up on their wedding day, they've got 9 months to get used to being a couple before adding a kid or two.  Assuming a young woman can have a baby a year, a newlywed couple has four years before reaching the point of having two toddlers and one infant in the home.

As an older mom, I find Jasmine's scenario funny and naive at the same time.  It's really funny because she's pitching one of those awful afternoons where everything is going wrong as the standard operating procedure.  There are some days where everything is going wrong and there's nothing to do but power through it. Having said that, not every day is a hot mess - and if it is - there's something else going on.   Naivete comes when Jasmine Baucham at 19 cannot conceptualize that the wife and mother in a home has neither a list of chores nor a list of errands that must be done before her parents come home.  A SAHM often has a list of urgent chores like "Do dishes before next meal because we are out of silverware", "Wash toddler's shirt before that stain sets" or "We NEED milk".  There's also the list of chores that need to be done regularly like "Sweep the floor" or "clean the bathroom sink" - but those can be skipped on a day with crabby-ass toddlers.    Ditto for errands - although packing everyone up for a trip to the store can sometimes break up a generalized bad mood in the house.

The next post also cover another time where Jasmine's parents leave LOTS of responsibility on her shoulders.